GG: The Age of Dissonance

Last night's Gossip Girl was pretty disappointing. After waiting six whole weeks for a new episode, that was the best they could do? Of course there was plenty of drama to go around though.

For a reason that I couldn't comprehend, the students were putting on the play Age of Innocence. Blair (Leighton Meester) has suddenly taken a new interest in being a serious actress, and continues to gloat about her perfect life. Serena (Blake Lively) has a crush on the director Julian. This is laughable because he is obviously gay. She gets Vanessa (Jessica Szohr) to help her impress him with her old-school film knowledge. Nate (Chace Crawford) overhears Vanessa and thinks that she is cheating on him with Julian. Oh boy.

Yuki finds out that she was accepted early into Yale, which means that Blair was not. Someone sends out a Gossip Girl blast about Serena's acceptance. This turns S and B against each other...again.

Meanwhile Dan (Penn Badgely) and the teacher Rachel are getting it on in the costume room. At school, really? Gross. The pair is caught when a note from the two is intercepted from Jenny by Dan's dad Rufus, awkward! It turns out that Rachel was the one who let Yale know about Blair's indiscretions and sent the text to GG about Serena. How mature. She's going back to Iowa now. See ya!

Carter Brazian (Sebastian Stan) returns while on a date with Chuck Bass's love interest Elle. Chuck, why are you still chasing this annoying girl? After she breaks his heart, he shows up at Blair's house. Alas, Blair isn't home. The 18-year-old Miss Waldorf is downing martinis at the bar and feeling like a bad person. Carter (who also happens to be Meester's real-life boyfriend) shows up to rescue her. Hmm, what will Chuck think about his arch-rival taking his girl?